Last week I posted a video that was filmed on a bit of a whim, not much context, lots of emotion and at the end, a few lessons sprinkled in. I made a reel that paired with the video too. And a post… All of which received much more attention than I anticipated.
I believe a part two is in order… to add a bit more context, as that was clearly a missing element. (whoops – that’s like forgetting the sugar in a pecan pie – which I have done! It wasn’t awful, just not as good)
First, thank you to everyone who took a moment to watch, to comment or DM. The love, encouragement and shared celebration, regarding my milestone event of moving in with my partner, was in a lot of ways overwhelming. Initially, I had what felt like, a vulnerability hangover. And, at the same time, a bit of a wave of inspiration, to continue to share a bit more about me personally and my journey, because so many people commented how it resonated with them.
OH! BTW, if we are just meeting here for the first time, hello! I’m Heather Patterson – I work with entrepreneurs and their teams – helping them grow their businesses by growing their belief and confidence in themselves and each other. I talk about business – some mystycal “woo woo” stuff and also the methodical – strategy and action side of things too.
Aside from business owner and coach, I play the role of partner, bonus momma to two boys, daughter, sister, auntie. I love exploring & new experiences – from adventures and travel, to new restaurants and vino! I golf, hike and when there’s water, I’m in it or on it – preferably via surfboard. Oh and Go Ravens! Welcome! I’m so glad you’re here!
I believe a part two is in order… to add a bit more context, as that was clearly a missing element (whoops – that’s like forgetting the sugar in a pecan pie – which I have done! It wasn’t awful, just not as good)
So here’s what we’ll cover:
- The context – what were all those tears about
- The lessons – how you can use them in your life and business
- Tools – from books to therapy to personal coaching
The Context
It’s funny how tears can mean so many different things, isn’t it? Last week, on moving day, I had been going thru the motions and not really allowing myself to process. Not uncommon for me to do that and by the time Monday came around, I had the gift of having some quiet time and space to reflect.
Gratitude and honoring of my journey was the theme of those tears.
As I mentioned in the last video, I had left an abusive relationship five years prior and had went hard on my healing and growth. One of the biggest lessons I learned was that I attracted that abuse. I was so terrible to myself, my inner dialogue constantly criticizing, shaming and degrading myself, I had gotten used to being treated like that and justified it subconsciously. This was a challenging discovery, to see how I had created my own suffering. There’s so much more to this and if you want to dig in a bit further, I’m happy to do that someday…today just isn’t the day.
All of that said, five years later, I was reflecting on the growth that I had experienced, and the standards that I had put in place because finally…cuz it felt like forever – and uh…in full transparency because I was repeating much of the same shit I had been doing in the past…now…finally – I was joining households with an amazing man, who would never treat me poorly. Why? How? Because I would never treat myself poorly ever again.
After years of questioning my worth, my value and importance I was crystal clear. I am worthy, I am valuable and I am important.
The Lessons
I went back and rewatched those lessons I rattled off…off the cuff…with no real planning or thought as to what I was going to say. They were:
- Know Yourself
- Know What You Want
- Be Willing to Trust (trust the process, the journey)
- Ask for Help
- Let People Help You
- Have Faith
- Abundance is your birthright.
Sure, I could add more here. The lessons are a plenty. These will do for now. Let’s elaborate, now that we are both a bit more settled and calm, shall we?!
Know Yourself – meaning, what are your values? What are your beliefs? Where do they come from? Are they supporting you in getting what you want? Are they even true?
Know What You Want – I talk about this all.the.time. What do YOU really want? Not what your parents wanted for you? Your spouse or sig other, or what your kids want. YOU – what do you really want? Not sure, I have just the tool. Click HERE for your free guide: The Fire Starter, to help you figure out what you want, really!
Trust – this goes hand in hand with beliefs. What do you believe about the world and the unfolding. That you can trust yourself? That you can trust others? That everything is happening FOR you? Or that the next villain is waiting around the corner to “get” you.
Ask For Help – again, back to beliefs. In a world that wants you to believe that you gotta go at this alone, buck the system. Ask for help.
Let Others Help You – once you’ve asked, you’re bound to get an answer that someone will not only be able to help, they will likely be eager to. But you gotta let them. Don’t block your blessings, receive them. Having trouble with this one, go back to beliefs. What do you believe about receiving help? Is it true? Or could you create a new belief about receiving that will help you move forward?
Have Faith – faith and fear both require us to believe in something we cannot see. I didn’t make that up – quote from mentor Bob Proctor. Fear sees the doom, the gloom. Faith on the other hand sees the positive possibilities. You get to choose.
Abundance is your birthright – YOU are the Universe. The Universe is infinite, just like you. Constantly expanding, seeing fuller expression. And yet again, you must choose to believe that.
Tools
I am about to give you some of my personal recommendations. Books, podcasts, seminars etc. They are from my personal experience. Not inclusive. No sponsorships, no paid promotions – nada. I want to stress, there are no “right answers” or “wrong answers” here. If you have something you want to add from your personal experience – by all means, leave a comment! The more resources out there, the better.
Books
- Think & Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill
- The Power of Awareness – Neville Goddard
- The How of Happiness – Sonja Lyubomirsky
- The Untethered Soul – Michael Singer
Podcasts
- The School of Greatness – Lewis Howes
- The Life Coach School – Brooke Castillo
- Anything with Brene Brown – Tim Ferris just did replay and wow!
Seminars & Workshops
- So many options here.
- Personally, PSI Seminars is a personal favorite that I recommend all of the time. Series of 4 courses that build on one another. Setup for continued learning and growth, with opportunities to take classes again and again, volunteer and form a great community along the way.
- Alison Armstrong is also a personal favorite.
- Plant medicine may even be something you’re willing to explore. I have and found it to be helpful in my growth and development.
Therapy
- More clinical in nature. Personal preference. Not a one size fits all solution. Be willing to be selective and find someone that works for you.
- Trauma – often specially address
- EAPs often have therapy as a covered treatment, check your insurance.
Coaching
- Obviously this is a solution I am going to mention.
- It might be with me and it might not be.
- Again, all about fit. Fit will often be determined by specialty, approach and even geography and availability play a part.
- If you ARE interested in exploring working together, schedule a consultation with me. I’d love to chat with you! My calendar can be accessed, HERE.
Aaaannnd…remember, this list isn’t inclusive. Annddd – just notice, what are your beliefs about any of the solutions I recommended. Are you making them “right” or “wrong”? Or could you simply be curious and find something….anything…for you?!
Oookay, that’s A LOT! Probably the longest I’ve done in quite sometime and it was what was required. I hope it was useful for you! See you next time!
